Every day, practically without fail, my saint of a dad goes to see my mom at the memory care center where she lives. My mom has dementia, and even though she’s not the same person she once was, my dad is unrelentingly steadfast in visiting her and helping care for her.
I mean, amazing much? (Also, look at this picture of us because how cute is my dad??)
But here’s the thing. My dad is super lonely because, even though my mom is alive, she’s not really herself. She can’t tell jokes or ask questions or be present in the relationship the way she once was.
And that leaves my dad feeling stucker than stuck.
His heart would love some companionship, but what an awful grey area. He feels guilty about wanting to meet someone who could help alleviate his loneliness, since my mom is still technically…around. She’s just not there.
The thing is, I don’t think my dad’s situation is that uncommon. At least in the sense of feeling like he’s confused and not sure which way to turn.
But the great news is that my dad—and anyone else feeling this way—can always put pen to paper and ask their heart for guidance.
Try literally asking your heart what it wants, and see what comes up. I know it sounds bananas, but I always say that the miracle of this exercise isn’t that it works—it’s that we take the time to try it at all.
Grab your pen and write the following sentence, and just let the words flow from there: Dear [Your Name], this is your heart, and this is what I want to tell you about [any issue you’re wrestling with].
This exercise will totally help you clear the clutter and connect to your heart, which has aaaallll the answers.
Thinking about changing jobs but not sure if you should?
Confused about whether to stay in that relationship or bail?
Wondering what’s keeping you from finishing that project?
Your heart knows the answers! And you can ask it. Literally.